I Believe in God but I Don't Trust Him Fully

Speaker 1: 0:01

All right. I have a question for you today. Have you ever considered yourself being a control freak? Okay, okay, okay. Maybe someone said just yes, yes, I am, I am, that's me. Okay, here's a test. Okay, here's a test to see how, if you're a control freak or someone who just likes to have control, you wouldn't say you're saying there's nothing freakish about it, I just want the control. Here you go. Here's a test. Do you have to have control over the remote and choose what you're watching on TV? Okay, all right, by show of hands. Who are here?

Speaker 1: 0:40

When making the decision to go somewhere to eat, somehow, in some way, you always end up going to the place that you want to go. Okay, and here's the good one. When it comes to driving, you have to drive, and if you don't drive, you are constantly judging the person who is driving. Yes, okay, all right, all right. So I might have to let you know you might have some symptoms of being a control freak. Okay, in the Gaines house, in my house, I like this thing that Erin is the controlling one, but she would like to say I'm the controlling one. But both of us would agree. Our children are the controlling ones. They definitely like to have things their way. I think all five of us are kind of that way. But here's the thing we all want control, and it makes sense. It makes sense. Control gives us a feeling of safety and security, but it can be problematic. It can be problematic if we want everything our way Okay, and this tends to blend into our spiritual lives at times. There are things that are hard to trust God with and there are some things that feel impossible to release to God, to release to God to trust them with it.

Speaker 1: 1:59

In fact, I want to read a passage of Scripture to you today, in Proverbs 9, 5 through 6, in the PSV version of the Bible, the PSV version of the Bible. Check this out. This is what it says Trust in the Lord with some of your heart, lean on your own understanding and, in some of your ways, acknowledge Him, and he can make your own path straight and you can make your own path straight. The PSV stands for the partially surrendered version of the Bible. Partially surrender. You may be saying, jago, that doesn't sound like the Bible. It's not the Bible. It's not the Bible. But the truth is and this stung me a little bit, my esteemed you truth is, this is actually the passage of Scripture. Most of us actually live our lives by, though this is kind of how we actually do it.

Speaker 1: 2:51

God, I'll give you some things, but I'm not going to give you everything. I'll give you some things, but I'm not going to give you everything. In some way, in some ways that defines every single person, and listening in here today and online, you know I'll give you some things in my life, god, but I can't give you everything. I'll give you an hour or a Sunday morning, but the rest of my week, well, let me check my schedule. But because, between work and taking the kids and picking the kids and taking them this place and that place, and because of all the different meetings I have, I might be able to squeeze you in for a coffee break, jesus, on Thursday. I'll pencil you in though, oh God, I might give every once in a while, but building a lifestyle generosity, I don't know.

Speaker 1: 3:35

I love Daniel's story, just the why didn't? The obedience of God. What a cool story. Oh God, I'm going to trust you with my salvation. I need your forgiveness, but I'm not entirely sure about this living every single day for you thing Like that sounds like a lot. You know you're asking a lot, Jesus. Here's the thing God has a purpose for you and you will never fully experience it. We will never fully experience it if we're holding back. If we hold back, if we hold onto things, it even goes in a way we think, and then this is what I fall guilty of, a lot right here. God, I believe you listen to their prayers, but I don't know if you listen to mine. God, I believe you're full of grace, but sometimes I don't know if that mercy applies to me, because some of the things I've done, you know, it seems pretty bad. It seems bad. I'll trust you with some things. A Christian atheist will say I believe in God, but I cannot trust you completely. I can't trust you completely.

Speaker 1: 4:33

I'm going to tell you a story about a guy named Charles Blondin. This guy became my hero. After I researched this Charles, we got a picture of him on the screen. Here's the picture of him June 30th 1859,. Charles is a tightrope walker. He was the very first person to cross Niagara Falls on a tightrope. I don't even I wonder who wakes up one day and says I want to do that. You know, but I don't know how. It was me. This is 160 feet above some crazy water. I don't know if you've ever been in Niagara Falls I've been. It is pretty crazy. And it's about 1100 feet in distance, almost a quarter of a mile. Okay, incredible feet.

Speaker 1: 5:06

He tightrope, he tightrope walks across Niagara Falls. Everyone goes nuts Like, oh, my goodness, he did this thing. That's crazy. I can't believe he did that. He's done it, he's accomplished. And in afterwards everyone was like now what, charles? What's she going to do next, after you already did that? So he said okay, are you second time? Second time, I'm going to do it on some stilts. So second time, he tightrope walks across Niagara Falls walking on stilts. I can't even imagine walking on a tightrope at all, especially with some stilts on. But guess what? He does it and everyone goes crazy Like, oh, my goodness, he did it, he crushed that thing. Charles, what's you going to do next? What's your next incredible feat you're going to do Third time.

Speaker 1: 5:47

Third time, my man I don't even know how he thought about this Third time my man grabs a burlap sack and he hops. He hopping across Niagara Falls, y'all in a sack, and he gets it tonight. He starts at one end, he gets the other end and everyone goes crazy Like, oh my goodness, I can't believe it. He can't believe it. And they say what are you going to do next time? And then this is the next thing he does. I can't make this up.

Speaker 1: 6:14

This is all based on a true story. My man, he walks on a tightrope again, but this time he gets to the middle of it, he stops, he bends down and my man cooks an omelet. He cooks an omelet y'all Not scrambled with some eggs, an omelet, peppers and everything, ham in there, everything. He cooks it and then he eats it. I don't even understand how you got the heat from it. Like, where do you even do it? My man eats an omelet on a tightrope in the middle of Niagara Falls. He gets to the end. Everyone's going oh my gosh, he ate an omelet. On this thing.

Speaker 1: 6:57

They're like Charles, what's you going to do next time? And he says oh, okay, fifth time I'm going to do this thing on a wheelbarrow. I'm going to push a wheelbarrow across, and not only am I going to push one, I'm going to put potatoes up in there, just cause. Because, why not? My man? That's the picture you saw. That's him right there. He pushes it, pushes it. He gets to the end and the press, the press is like this dude is incredible, they're going nuts. Oh my goodness, he did it, he did it, he did it five times in five different ways. And then finally one of the guys from the press is like Charles, charles, I believe, I believe you can do that with someone sitting in the wheelbarrow. And then Charles said to him, said to the man in the press, he says you know what? You're right, how about you hop in and we do it right now? And the man from the press is like no, I can't trust you with that man, I can't trust you with that. And it's kind of makes me think about something I believe you can, but I don't believe you enough to actually get in the wheelbarrow.

Speaker 1: 8:09

Can I speak some gospel message to us today? God, I believe in you. You're Jesus, son of God. Defeated, went on the cross, defeated death rose again. You stand at the right hand of God, interceding on my behalf. I believe in you, but I don't trust you with my finances. I believe in you, but my kids I don't know. I can't surrender that to you. I believe in you, god, but but and there's always a big but that gets in the way I believe in you.

Speaker 1: 8:43

But Peter this is great story in the Bible, peter he gets out of the boat, he steps into the waves and the winds and the waves are pressing up against the. It hits the winds and the waves and I love and I love this story because we're like man. I want to have a miraculous life of faith like that. I want to be a person that experiences the power of God like that. But most of us, most of us, are too freaked out to get out of the boat. Most of us are too freaked out to get out of the boat and most of us say my feet are never going to touch the water. I want to walk on water, but I'm not going to get out of the boat. But I'll trust you with some things, but I won't trust you with everything, with everything. And here's the thing if you're finding yourself in this message, I want to encourage you. You're not alone in your faith struggles. You're not alone in your faith struggles.

Speaker 1: 9:35

In Mark's gospel we have a story of a dad who brings his son to Jesus to be healed. Okay, and this is a very personal story. He brings his son to Jesus to be healed. His son was was possessed by by what they believe was a demonic spirit. And in fact the disciples tried to cast out the demon, but they were unable to do so. So Jesus was somewhat frustrated with their lack of faith. And then the dad brings the son to Jesus and check out what he says. Check out what he says Mark 9.22. He says but if you can, if, but if you can't do anything, take pity on us and help us. And Jesus is like if, if, if I can. Jesus like get the if out of that sentence. It's not an if I can. Jesus replies back to him. He says if you can't. Jesus said everything is possible for the one who believes, everything is possible for the one who believes.

Speaker 1: 10:33

Immediately, the boys father exclaimed I do believe, help me overcome my own belief. And I love this passage of scripture. You want to know why I love it. I love it is because my faith is imperfect, it's flawed, it's lacking, and so does yours. At times. So does yours, and I love that.

Speaker 1: 10:52

In this scripture, god's word gives us permission to believe in God, yet to ask him to help us where we don't have faith. This is a scripture that highlights the relationship between you and God. This is a story that highlights that this thing is a relationship thing. It's not that he's just a deity out there somewhere that we can pray to and he might listen, but that God we can have an ongoing, growing relationship with God, that he hears us, he knows our struggles. This is the importance of spending daily time with God when we pray, read scripture, turn off the phones and sit with God. It's in those moments that God can take our doubts and we can talk to him about it.

Speaker 1: 11:39

The father said I believe, but will you help me overcome my own belief? I want to trust you and I sort of do, but I have a hard time trusting you all the way. What I want to ask you today is this can we get honest with ourselves? Can we get honest with ourselves and I want to call it out for every one of you who listens to this message there's something that you've been kind of holding on to that's been hard for you to let go, hard for you to trust God with. And what I want to say right now, I want to give you permission to release that to God right now. What is it? What is that thing?

Speaker 1: 12:18

For some of you, it may be a doubt, it may be a fear, it may be some heartache or trouble. You would say this I don't fully trust God blank. And you can fill in that blank right there. You can fill in that blank and begin to talk to God about that. For some of you it's easy. You would say it's your kids, it's their present or their future. For some of you, you wake up every day battling fear and anxiety. You have a hard time believing that bad things aren't going to happen that day. For others, it's a money thing. It's a money thing. One of the reasons that the Bible talks about money more than any other subject in our world is that it's one of the hardest things to trust anyone with. It's not trust anyone with. I trust you, but I can't release you. For others, it's an addiction that you think you can handle, but you can't. But you can't. What is it? You gotta call it out. You gotta become courageous about it.

Speaker 1: 13:24

There's things that we're holding on to that we don't fully trust God with. There's things that we're holding on to we don't fully trust God with. And your breakthrough comes in that release. Your breakthrough comes when you say God, I'm gonna release this to you. I'm gonna release this bitterness to you. I'm gonna release this pain to you. I'm gonna release this unforgiveness to you. There is freedom that comes when we release, when we release things to God. So that's what I'm gonna encourage us to do. We gotta call out here's the thing I deeply believe that honesty is the beginning of liberation. Honesty is the beginning of liberation. The Bible says the truth of God will set us free, and that's what God wants for us. It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Yet so many of us are living in our own created prisons, holding back and hiding things from God that, frankly, he already knows.

Speaker 1: 14:20

As I was preparing this message, I asked God to show me some areas of my life where I was kind of like, where areas of my life God has held things back that didn't fully trust you with, and it was very easy for me to come up with that. It wasn't, that wasn't hard at all, and a few of them were this something I wanted to share with you was that when I thought about I used to struggle with trusting God, with provision in my life, with finances and taking care of me, and there was this false security that I had in the sense of validation there. And then when I started to tithe 10%, God didn't necessarily start giving me money. No, it didn't happen like that. Now he opened the door for other areas of my life that God began to trust God in those areas. In my early young adult years I had an addiction that almost derailed my life and that was a process of learning how to trust God and I turned into escapism for things. But the biggest thing and I'm being completely transparent here today the biggest thing I've been learning how to trust God with is this place right here is LVC is local vineyard church.

Speaker 1: 15:22

I've been doing ministry since I was 16 years old, been on staff at a church since I was 17,. You know, you know years old, so over 15 years of vocational ministry experience ran a very if you know my story ran a very large youth ministry down in Virginia Beach. Come on, got some Virginia Beach people up in here. I mean we had events. We had 1000 kids, 1000 young people come out to church. You know the whole author. We filled hundreds of kids giving their life to Jesus. I mean it was awesome, it was an amazing time. But a lot of that was honestly based on my personality, like you know, I was able to be very relatable to youth and kind of do that and war, war, that kind of thing I mean. Every Thursday we did youth. On Thursday, my car would be packed with about 15 youth. I'd pick them up right from school. You know, that was just the kind of guy I want. Whatever it took to get young people to come to know Jesus is what I was doing. And but here you go.

Speaker 1: 16:18

Once we started LVC, it hit me hard, especially recently, that, man, for this church to flourish the way that God wants it to, it requires all of us to take ownership. It requires all of us to take ownership and you may be like well, this is my first time here today. Maybe you too, maybe you're here for a reason. Maybe you look at your life and you say I want to use my life to make a difference. And I'm telling you, here at LVC, we are going to use our gifts and our talents to make a difference, to impact Richmond and greater beyond because of that. So you want to see it, and it may require all of us to be fully engaged in the mission of seeing everyday people learn how to become Jesus followers. It's all of us find a purpose and a passion to see people, the people you love, the people you care about, to be with Jesus, to become like Jesus and do the stuff that Jesus did.

Speaker 1: 17:17

And for me, here you go, here's my struggle, here's my struggle for me to learn how to delegate and empower people and provide structures. I'm learning how to trust God with something I'm not very good at. And I'm learning how to give the awesome people on our team who are good at those things in the room, in the ability to thrive. And I want to tell you, guys, today, god wants to use you Not to just grow this church so we can just have a whole bunch of people in chairs. No, no, no, that's not what we're doing. I mean, we're not just putting butts in chairs. God wants to use you to partner with the vision of to see everyday people learn how to become Jesus followers, because in that relationship that those in the people have with Jesus, that breakthrough will happen, Healing will happen in their lives, generational curses will be broken in Jesus' name, healing will happen.

Speaker 1: 18:09

And so when we say we want to help everyday people learn how to become Jesus followers, man, that's you saying God, I am signing up for a mission that is beyond me and I need you to do it, and I want to encourage you all to be a part of that. Because here you go, lvc, it isn't a hobby for me, it isn't something that I do with my spare time. This is what God has called me to and that's why I pray daily for this church. And I want to challenge you whatever it is that you have in your heart, as you know, you need to release to God. I encourage you to go all out, find freedom in there, find freedom from that thing. Don't stay, don't live one more day saying I'm going to hold on to this bitterness. Don't live one more day saying I'm going to hold on to this depression. I'm not saying that you'll be healed from depression in one day, but I am saying that God will begin to direct your paths. He'll begin to direct your paths. Okay, here you go.

Speaker 1: 19:07

Going back to the verse I read earlier, I'll read it in the actual version of the Bible. It says this it says trust in the Lord with with how much? How much? With all your heart, with all your heart. Now, that sounds kind of horror, jacob, like I mentioned a few weeks ago, I said there is a relentless assault on our hearts. There is an enemy that wants to go after your heart, that wants you to stay down because, because God didn't come so we can have behavioral modification, he came so we can have life transformation, and transformation happens in the heart. Jesus says out of the overflow of the heart you'll speak. It's a heart thing that Jesus is interested in. And so there is an enemy that is going to relentlessly pursue your heart. Check this out, check this out and then just think about it. Think about it for a second, prior to you making a decision that you don't want to make.

Speaker 1: 20:07

Oftentimes there was a thing said to you, a person, a problem, a memory, a date that triggered and wounded your heart. And even our biggest sin and this is why grace is so good Our biggest sin oftentimes is a response to a wounded heart, and Jesus. Jesus wants to heal our hearts, and so we trust in Him with what All of our hearts. So that means I trust in you, god, even in the wounded places of my heart, even in the broken places of my heart, even in the places I haven't quite figured everything out yet. I trust you with that, bethany, you can place something up here for us. I trust you with those things with all of your heart. And then it says lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways. The Bible says submit to Him. Now again, that's one of those words we don't like to use too much in our culture Submit to Him. Other translations say acknowledge Him and he will make your path straight.

Speaker 1: 21:14

Who in here is tired of walking around like this? I'm going to do this job. I'm going to beat up my kids this week. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm going to go to Wegmans? No, I'm going to make too expensive. I'm going to you know, you just walk it around in circles, walking around not knowing where to go.

Speaker 1: 21:43

And I'm saying oftentimes we walk around not knowing where to go because our heart is wounded and then that bleeds into our marriage. The reason why we yell at our kids is not that we're really that mad at our kid, but my heart is wounded and I have power over them. I can control some things because I have that control, but I'm going to submit. Hey, george, he doesn't have water right there. Someone gave me awesome water and I totally took it away. Thank you so much, but I'm going to submit.

Speaker 1: 22:21

I'm going to submit to him in that, to apply this scripture to our lives, we've got to understand what this means.

Speaker 1: 22:34

And then it's that word submit. It's that yada, that comes from the Hebrew word yada. Not to be confused with Yoda. That was a good one, right, it was okay. We got to yada him.

Speaker 1: 22:57

Yada means this it's coming to know and submit by observing, reflecting and experiencing. I think about, I reflect on what he's doing and then experiencing his love. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean on your own understanding Everything about your life and all your ways. Come to him and submit to him. That's a good one. That's a big thing, that's hard, that's easier said than done, but when we do this he will make your path straight. That doesn't mean debris won't fall in your path, that doesn't mean things won't get in your way, but what it means is that I am going to live my life connected to the heart of God and I'm going to follow him no matter what comes my way. I will trust him no matter what. So when troubles come, when the storm comes, when I'm afraid and I feel like I'm about to sink in the water. I see that Jesus reaches out and he picks me up and he walks with me. I submit my heart to him. I bring him into the chaos of my life and I will yada him. I will know him, I will know him deeply In this word.

Speaker 1: 24:20

Yada one other time. We see it is in the Genesis account and it says that Adam yada Eve and she bore a child. And this word is not sexual in nature, but it is intimate in nature. It's an intimate knowing of God that I just don't know God in here. But I know God in here and I know God is for me and I know God is with me and I know I can trust him and I know I can keep pursuing him and going after him, even, even, even when I want to quit, even when I want to give up, even when I want to lash out, even when I don't want to be nice to that person, I want to uppercut. I'm going to trust him. I'm going to trust him. Here you go.

Speaker 1: 25:06

We have a tendency we want God to prove himself so we can trust him. We have a tendency to do that. And here's the truth. If you live your life with this perspective, god will bless you, but then you'll always be looking for the next blessing. Okay, thank you for the house you gave me, but what about the next day, the next day, the next God? I want you to prove to me your faithfulness so I can trust you. We do that with God, but don't we know that doesn't even work with any relationship in our lives. So why would it work with God? In fact, there's nothing in the Bible that she says God works his way. In fact, everything in the Bible says God works the opposite way. You want to know how God works. God wants us to trust him so that he can prove himself. God, I'm going to trust you and I'm going to watch you over and over again. Prove yourself. It takes faith. Faith is the confidence in what we hope for that will actually happen and give us assurance about the things we cannot see. You have to believe in what you cannot prove so that it can release God to do. You can do what you never can do. Faith always comes first and the scripture says it's impossible to please God without faith, but we can please him with it.

Speaker 1: 26:33

There's this amazing animal. Get a little animal planet on you guys for a second here. This is amazing animal. That African Impella is a picture. Look at that. Now, here's the cool thing about this, about this animal. This animal can jump 10 feet high and run at and run at a speed, and they can jump over 30 feet. That's, that's some good jumping. That's pretty good. That's some doesn't you know? I used to do that back in my day. Yet this animal can be contained in any zoo with nothing more than a three foot tall solid wall. How on earth is that possible? Because in its instincts of the Impella, it will never jump unless they can see where it feet will land.

Speaker 1: 27:23

And when it comes to our spiritual lives, sometimes we don't jump with that confession because we don't know, on the other end of that, how it's going to hurt the people that we love. Sometimes we don't jump to that opportunity that we feel like God is leading us to because we can't control it. I'm going to tell you this what I learned about becoming a church planter is this I got no control over nothing. And then, when I became a parent, I got no control over nothing. No, no, seriously, I can't control it. And just because I can't see it doesn't mean God doesn't want me to jump for it Doesn't mean I can't trust him with it. Friends, I have to trust without seeing, because if I see everything, is that really even trust? Is that really, yatta?

Speaker 1: 28:38

Here's the challenge. I want you to take the next 48 hours that's two days, just in case you didn't know and whatever you felt like you wanted to release to God. I want you to make a move on that this week. If it's a phone call, if it's signing up for counseling, if it's having a meeting with me and you need to talk about something, I'd love to meet with you or talk to someone from our team. We'd love to talk with you. If it's finally telling that boss, you will not take advantage of me anymore because my family matters, whatever it is, do it.

Speaker 1: 29:18

And the first thing you're gonna experience is this you'll get to know the goodness of God. When you step out in faith, you'll know that God's goodness will follow you. And, secondly, you will know the love of God. When you step out in faith, you'll know that God is good and that you'll know that God loves you and he cares for you. And then you will begin to see. You will begin to see and get to know the faithfulness of God, how he will move you every step of the way.

Speaker 1: 29:42

And Psalm 103 says this know that the Lord is God. It is he who makes us and we are his, we are his people, the sheep of his pastor. Enter his gate, therefore, with thanksgiving and his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name, for the Lord is good and I'm gonna tell you this when you step out, you'll see that his love endures forever. It endures forever. And get into know the love of God, his faithfulness this is the best part. His faithfulness continues through all generations and I gotta prophetically speak today for some of you to get healing from that thing, to get freedom from that thing.

Speaker 1: 30:25

It doesn't just change you, it changes the future generation, it changes your kids and their kids. And I'm gonna tell you this it's easy to stay stuck, but it takes someone of wisdom and courage and strength to say God, I'm gonna step out of faith, I'm gonna jump, even I don't know where I'm going to land and I'm gonna trust you completely. I'm gonna trust you wholeheartedly. I'm gonna trust you not when it's just convenient. Therefore, we enter his gates with thanksgiving, we enter his courts with praise, whatever it is that you have a hard time of letting go of, you can trust him with far more than you think. Pray with me, church, god, jesus, holy Spirit.

Speaker 1: 31:31

Wow, satan did not want people to hear that today, god, I'm gonna trust you wholeheartedly. I'm gonna trust you wholeheartedly. I know I don't be talking about Satan and the devil like that too much from the stage, but I gotta acknowledge something today, friends, I gotta acknowledge that this church, that LVC, that God, you wanna use this place to help everyday people find freedom from their lives, find healing in their lives. You wanna see the next generation not repeat what the previous generation did in Jesus' name. And so, god, we don't stop. We take under mantra of pedity we won't stop, can't stop up in here, because there are people that need you, god, and we're gonna go after you.

Speaker 1: 32:27

And so, if you're in here today, don't live one more day. Hold it on to that bitterness. There's freedom in Jesus' name If you're in here today and there's a depression that keeps sucking the life out of you. There is freedom in Jesus' name. If you're in here today and you want to experience the goodness of God. You wanna live a life not partially surrendered, but wholeheartedly surrendered. There's freedom in Jesus' name, for who the sun sets free is free, indeed, not partially free, not kind of free, but free through and through. So, jesus, we come to you. Bless every person in this place today, protect them from the lies of the enemy that they can't and they won't and they will never. And may your voice gently, calmly, lovingly give hope, freedom, victory. That's why the Lord's saying release it. It's not your master, release it, release it. We love you in this place today, jesus, in Jesus' name amen.