Break the Cycle That's Breaking Your Life

Speaker 1: 0:00

There is a habit in the Gaines household that is just bad. It is a horrible habit that I don't know how it happened, I don't know who started it, I don't know who was the first person to do it, but this habit is so bad. Not only do Aaron and I do it, but our kids do it as well. Ok, it's a bad. You want to know what the habit is? I actually have a picture of the bad habit that we got. It's called leaving things on the stairs. Are we the only family that does this? It's a horrible habit and I don't know. It's like we think the stairs are like the transition from things from downstairs to upstairs, you know, but then everything ends up on there. Like we got socks, like where did the socks come from? Who took their socks off and left them on the stairs? It's insane what happens. And someone like me, who is a clean freak, it drives me nuts. I'm like, but I'm a part of it, I'm a part of the problem. Aaron even had this great suggestion one time that we tried to put a basket at the bottom of the stairs but guess what happened? Overflowing. The basket just overflowed. You know it didn't work. It's a bad habit that we have worked hard to break and we just can't. We haven't been able to do it.

Speaker 1: 1:13

Now, I think it's safe to say all of us have some habits in our lives that we wish weren't there, that aren't ideal, that aren't the best things for us, things that we do that we wish we did not do. Here's the thing when you think about it, when you think about this, nobody, nobody, plans to mess up their lives, right? No one says, man, I got a great five-year goal on how I'm really going to screw up my life. You know, yeah, I don't think anyone says that, right, I don't think anyone has that plan. But what happens? Well, you know what happens? Because we see people who make big mistakes and they mess up their lives. What happens? Nobody plans to mess up their lives, but what happens is just like my stairs, with junk on the stairs. There's some things that happen in our lives and we wonder how did that habit get there? Why did I start doing that thing? Why did I start having that thought? And this is what it is Very rare do people end up in a bad place all at once.

Speaker 1: 2:20

How do most people mess up their lives? They do it. One bad decision, they do it, one wrong step, and they do it one harmful habit at a time. One harmful habit at a time, one unwise decision, one wrong step, one bad habit at a time. Now I'm going to show you, in our Bible study today, an example of this from a guy who, on the outside, looks amazing. He had amazing hair, he had amazing strength, he probably had dreamy eyes, for all we know, but from the outside he looked like he had it all, but he ended up losing his amazing hair, he lost his strength, he lost his dreamy eyes, literally, and he lost his life. And that character in the Bible is a character known as Samson Samson.

Speaker 1: 3:11

How does someone who has so much potential like Samson end up so broken, living a life that was completely devastated? The answer is he didn't do it all at once. He didn't do it all at once. He didn't make one bad decision one time. He did one bad step, one wrong decision, one harmful habit, again and again and again at a time. To be specific, though, to be actually very specific about his wrong decisions, he probably took around 56,250 steps in the wrong direction. Well, let me explain it to you. I explain it to you. He didn't mess up his life all at once. It was a lot of unhelpful, unhealthy decisions and habits and it started with this and this is how his habits started.

Speaker 1: 4:02

Judges 16.1 says this One day Samson went to Gaza where he saw a prostitute. Yeah, that sounds like the beginning of some bad decisions. You know that doesn't sound good. One day he made what was his first bad decision that led to another bad decision, that led to an ongoing bad habit that led him to a life of destruction. I did a little research on this, from the place that Samson was born to Gaza. He lived in a place called Zora, which sounds like something from Star Wars to me, but it's not. But he lived in Zora and he traveled all the way down to Gaza.

Speaker 1: 4:43

How does someone, with so much going on in their lives, so much potential, how does someone, make a bad decision and mess everything up? How does someone so talented do this? The answer is you do it step by step and in Samson's case, 25 miles of steps From Zorah to Gaza is the equivalent of 56,250 steps. See, nobody. No one plans to mess up their lives. No one plans to live paycheck to paycheck for year after year, struggling to be alive financially. No one dreams of doing a job they absolutely hate. Nobody plans on living an undisciplined life, nobody plans to have Christmas without their children, but it happens far too often, and what I want to tell you today is this it doesn't have to be your story. It doesn't have to be your story. It doesn't have to be our story.

Speaker 1: 5:44

We've been learning in the series the Power of Change our spiritual what, our spiritual how, our spiritual who, and today we're going to learn what is our spiritual whatnot? What is our spiritual whatnot? What is the thing that we aren't going to do? And our question for today is this very important, very important. I want you to think about this. Okay, our question today is this Based on who you want to become, what is one habit you need to break?

Speaker 1: 6:13

Based on who you want to become, not just what you want to do, not just the things that you want to achieve, but based on who you want to be, based on the person that you want people to remember you as, based on the legacy that you want to leave, based on the story about yourself. Based on who you want to be, what is one habit, what is one thing in your life keeping you from achieving who you want to be and, better yet, who God is calling you to be. What is that one habit? Based on who you want to be? What is that one thing? Just think about it for a moment and give yourself a second to think about it. I think we can probably think of those things pretty fast. But there's those habits that have been haunting you, maybe for years, maybe since your adolescence, maybe for a long time, and you feel like you tried to stop and you tried and you tried and you did this and this thing, but this habit keeps coming up. Based on who you want to become, what habit do you need to break?

Speaker 1: 7:11

I love what James says in the Bible. James 1 says this. He says so get rid of every filthy habit that sounds good, all right and all the wicked conduct. Submit to God and accept the word that he plants in your hearts, which is able to save you. We get rid of anything that's not pleasing to God, and then we submit to him and accept his living word. And this is why spending daily time with God is so important. This is why, like the reason why I always talk about man, we got to spend daily time with God, because when you begin to understand what God says about you, who God says about you, it makes it easier to get up and say you know what, I'm not going to believe that lie anymore. I'm not going to believe that thing anymore. I'm not even going to believe what this situation is trying to tell me about who I am and who God says I am. Because I'm spending daily time with God, I'm going to get into his heart. Okay, so he plants that in his heart. So here you go.

Speaker 1: 8:05

I want to be specific with you today. Okay, based on who do you want to become? What is one habit you need to break? And this is what I want you to do. I want you to define it. What is that one habit? Don't justify it away. I know I've been there before, I've had some bad habits and I just justify it. Oh well, I do this because of that and I do this because this happened to me and there's some validity in there. But I want you to be specific. Okay, Define it, because you cannot defeat what you do not define. You can't defeat what you do not define. So you have to define it. You have to define it. What is the habit you want to break and kind of what I've experienced based on people that I've talked to.

Speaker 1: 8:47

There's some common things that people want to break. Some say it would be their diets. Like come on, that's me, I want to eat. Some people say I want to eat fewer sweets. That sounds good. Or maybe cut down on fast food. Fast food is not even affordable anymore. It's like, why do I even go there? Okay, you know, maybe that's. Or maybe it's digital. Maybe it's digital. You know you don't want to play video games every day. Or maybe you do want to play video games every day, but your spouse doesn't want you to play video games all day. Maybe you should listen to them. Or maybe you want to limit your time on social media.

Speaker 1: 9:26

Life is way too valuable and you're calling too great to waste your life on things that don't last. It might maybe there's an addiction to pornography that you want to get out of your life and it's ruining you. It's poisoning your mind and your relationships. It's hurting them. It could be a substance issue in your life that's taking over your life. You might be abusing prescription medication, or maybe you're trying to quit smoking and you haven't been able to do so, or maybe it's alcohol. One thing I would say is this. One thing I would say is this, because I know sometimes like well, do I really have a problem? Is this really a problem? This is what I want. This is kind of your indicator. Okay, if more than one person who loves you and cares about you has raised a concern about something like that in your life.

Speaker 1: 10:04

Wisdom says to listen. Wisdom says to listen. Listen to it, pay attention to it. But here you go. It may not be something visible on the outside. You may have some things on the inside that you want to address. I know that's for me a lot of times. It may be an attitude thing. Maybe you got some habitual attitudes that are robbing you from the joy that God wants to give. Maybe it's this. Maybe you have a critical spirit. You've already been in church. You've been in church here and now, and you've been here for what? 30 minutes and you're already criticizing 10 things already. You know, maybe that's just kind of how you're wired to be critical, and there's actually some positive things on having a viewpoint like that, but when it's not redeemed, when it's just pointing out other people's flaws because you're trying to avoid people from seeing you and seeing the things that's going on in you. Maybe it's that. Maybe it's a complaining spirit. Maybe you're always finding something to complain about. Maybe something that your kids do are never enough or whatever's going on. Maybe it's a gossiping tongue. Based on who you want to become.

Speaker 1: 11:03

What one habit do I have? Slash? Had three really bad habits. I've had more than three, but three particular bad habits that have been hard for me to overcome. One I did overcome, two I have not. Can I be honest today? Okay, okay, the one habit, one of the habits that I have not been able to break and I told the guys at men's group so I got accountability. But one habit I haven't been able to break is I eat candy in my bed. It's so bad guys, like after I brush my teeth and everything, like on my bedside right now there's just Starburst wrappers, skittle packs, easter just happened. I ate all my kids' Easter candy. It's horrible. I don't know why I do it. Aaron just looks at me sometimes he's like what's wrong with you? I'm like I don't know. Babe. You know that's one. The other one is I bite my fingernails Like that one's a real, that one's nasty. And now I even catch my daughter doing it, I'm like, no, I'm passing it down to her. You know, that's one, but one habit I have been able to overcome.

Speaker 1: 12:13

It took me a while, but one habit I have been able to overcome is screen time on my phone. So back in 2020, and I've shared this story before, but back in 2020, I reached almost an eight hour a day on my phone limit. That's how you know, and again I could justify it. Everything was online. Why does working online? I got to post videos on social media and then there's again, there's truth to that. Here's the thing about justifications. There's a lot of truth to it. But then there's also the matters of our heart. When you know the thing you're doing isn't the thing that you want to be doing. You know, and that's where it hit for me, and so for me, you know, I was on my phone and I would view it. I would pick it up when I felt bored or stressed, or really. I just didn't try to distract myself because there's so much stress going on in my life in that particular time. But with a lot of intentionality, I was able to reduce that eight hours to now it's been right under an hour of screen time on my phone, which is great.

Speaker 1: 13:15

But this raises an important question, though, one that you probably have thought before why is it that good habits are really difficult to start and why is it that bad habits are really difficult to break? Like, have you ever wondered that? Like, have you ever said, man, I'm going to start some good habits? And then you just what, if you just say I'm going to do some good things, and then, yay, I did it, I'm doing it, this is awesome. And that bad habit, nah, I don't want that thing anymore. And you just stop, it doesn't work that way, does it? Now, there's a lot of things to that chemically in our brains that I won't say in this message, but there's something important to understand, kind of a baseline thing, to understand why it's difficult to start good habits and why it's hard to break bad habits. The reason is this because the reason why good habits are difficult to start is because the pain is now but the payoff is later. I want you to get this okay the reason why it's difficult to start good habits is because the pain is now but the payoff is later. Now I'm going to pick on jogging for a second, because it's easy, it's universal.

Speaker 1: 14:23

You can kind of apply this illustration to all walks of life. Say, you wake up to the mat. Say you say I'm going to be a jogger, I'm going to be a jogger, I'm going to be a fast walker you know one of the two. And you say I'm going to do it. And what do you do? You go and you buy all the nice shoes, you get your workout gear, you know, because you got to look cute before you do it. And so you get all your stuff.

Speaker 1: 14:44

And then you say, man, tomorrow morning I'm going to wake up early. You get all ready, say whoo, jogging time, you know. And then what happens? You open the door and it's cold outside. You know, it's cold Like man, it's freezing. I didn't know it was this cold this time of the day, you know.

Speaker 1: 14:59

And then you get out there, you muscle through it and you run. Now your feet hurt, your big toe hurts, you know. And then At the end of the week you go on the scale, the numbers don't change. And you say to yourself it's not worth it. It's not worth it because the pain is now, but what? The payoff is later. But you know, if you consistently did it, you'll see the results you want. Now, here you go. Now, that's jogging, but you can apply that to really anything, any good habits in your life that you're trying to do. But here you go.

Speaker 1: 15:34

When it comes to why a bad habit is difficult to break, the answer is in reverse, because with bad habits, the payoff is now, but the pain comes later. Come on, come on, think about this. The payoff, the relief, the sugar high, the buzz, the dopamine hit. It's now. It the payoff, the relief, the sugar high, the buzz, the dopamine hit. It's now, it's instant and it feels good in the moment. And it resolved that problem for this second. Until now, you recognize, you got more problems Now, for example, I love Doritos, dude, I love me some Doritos and they always got the different flavors and I always got to try every new flavor that comes out.

Speaker 1: 16:12

You want to know what I want to do sometimes, because, after being with the kids all day and working and all the stress, sometimes, man, at the end of the day I could eat a whole bag of Doritos while watching a television show that is killing my brain cells. Like I could do it, man, and I'll be in there. I'm watching Shogun. I, I could do it, man, and I'll be in there. I'm watching Shogun, I'm just in it, I'm doing it, you know, I've got it, you know, and the relief is now right when I do it.

Speaker 1: 16:36

But the pain in the middle of the night, when my stomach's hurting or when my brain's overstimulated from the shows. Now I'm having weird dreams. And then, because I'm no, because my stomach hurts and because I have weird dreams, I didn't sleep that well, and so the next day I'm all grouchy and I'm not ready to take on the day. And then I got to take my daughter to school and then, when I'm backing out of the driveway, I mow down my neighbor's dog, skippy, because that didn't really happen, but it could, you know. But this is what happens, right, the payoff is now, but the pain is later.

Speaker 1: 17:09

And, like the song we sung this morning, I don't want to be a slave to something that just feels good in the moment but leaves me worse off. I don't want it, and I know that's not what God wants for you. I know when God made you and designed you and created you, he didn't want you just to have temporary pleasures filled with a bunch of regret, but he wants you to be able to live life, and life to the fullest. Do you believe that when Jesus tells us that, that he came, that you may have life and have it more abundantly, isn't that a beautiful promise? And that's what he promises us? That's what he promises us.

Speaker 1: 17:46

This goes back to my screen time thing in my phone and why I wanted to break the habit. I did a little research and I did some math today. If you know me, I hate math. So the fact that I did math today shows how much I love you guys. Okay, and so I did a little bit of research. And for those who aren't convicted yet about screen time, maybe after this you will be Okay, here you go. So it says this I'm going to do some math. Four hours a day. I'm sorry, I skipped over my point a little bit.

Speaker 1: 18:17

The average person spends a little less than four hours a day on their phone. Okay, 2.5 hours on social media, but four hours a day on your phone, four hours a day on your phone times, 365 days a year, equals 1,460 hours a year on your device. Okay, staring at your screen, Okay, let's look at this. Let's look at this. Say you do this for 60 years. Say you got a smartphone when you were 15 because your parents are really nice to you, and then you die at 75. Okay, so 60 years Say 60 years, you have a smartphone and this is the average. So most people. It'll be longer than this for most people, but most people. 1,460 hours times 60 years equals 87,600 hours. How much is that in real time? 87,600 hours divided by the normal 24-hour day means the average person will spend about 3,650 days, or 10 years of your life, looking at your screen. 10 years of your life.

Speaker 1: 19:24

Now, why did I bring that up? Why did I bring that up? Because it hits the point why most people don't ruin their lives all at once. It's small decisions at a time. One wrong step, one wrong decision, one wrong habit at a time. So, based on who you want to become, what one habit do you need to break and the way we're going to break this habit? I want to give us some practical tools today, okay, and the way we're going to break this habit I'm going to give us some practical tools today, okay, and the way we're going to break this habit is this First thing is let's remove the cue.

Speaker 1: 20:00

We've got to remove the cue. We've got to remove the thing that cues us up. We've got to remove the thing that triggers us. We've got to do something. You know for someone, your phone dings and you look right at it. You got to remove the key. You got to remove the trigger.

Speaker 1: 20:12

Proverbs 4 says this Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evildoers. Check this out. It says don't even get close to it. It says avoid it, do not travel on it, turn from it and go on your way. I mean that's some good advice. Just avoid it. You don't got to try to see if you're strong enough to handle the temptation. Just get away from it, remove the trigger, don't get close to it, don't get near it, don't travel on it, turn from it, remove the cue. And here's the thing.

Speaker 1: 20:42

Here's the thing about this, though, because and I've shared this story with you guys before I've been a little little over 10 years I guess you can use the word sober from a pornography addiction that I had Almost derailed my life, and I remember thank you for the clap, thank you, yes, and I remember when I first started to find freedom in that area of my life, when I had free time. I said, well, what do I have to do? Like, what am I supposed to do? And in my heart I wanted to go back to the thing that I used to do, because, even though I knew it was bad for me, I was familiar with it. When we read the story about the Israelites, again like the song we sing today, they wanted to go back to Egypt, not because Egypt was better, but because they were familiar with it. They were familiar with that thing.

Speaker 1: 21:28

And so it raises the question again the reason why sometimes, even though we know the habit that we're doing, we don't want to do, the reason why we don't remove the trigger, remove the cue, because in our heart we kind of want to do it, we kind of want that thing, because there's an identity attached to it. And who am I without it, without this thing that relieves my stress? And what do I do if I don't have it anymore? And luckily, god's provision for me, I was able to find a deeper relationship with God to replace that thing. Come on, I'm getting a little deep. I'm getting a little deep, but that's because I want to see you have freedom in your lives. What I want for you is a life that you can look back at the end of your life and say, god, I did everything I could for you. God can look back at the end of your life and say, god, I did everything I could for you. God, I left a legacy that's going to outlast my life. God, I'm going all in for you. That's my hope for you.

Speaker 1: 22:17

Okay, so we're going to remove the cue. We looked at this last week the habit cycle and I think we have a picture. We might have a picture of the habit cycle again, and we know that anytime we get in a habit, there's a cycle, there's something that triggers you, and that habit is the cue. You see donuts, you crave donuts. You eat a donut, you get your sugar high. Then you say why did I eat all them donuts? That's what happens. There's a cue. If you want to break the bad habit, remove the cue. If you want to stop what you do, remove the cue. Get the phone out of your room, take it away. You remove it, you get rid of it. And what I want to do is I want to show you five common areas that cue us. Okay, the five most common causes that cue us, five ones. First one is this Places.

Speaker 1: 23:00

There's places that we go. First of all, there's a certain place you go and you can get triggered there and to act a certain way. Second is times. There's certain times of the day where you're more vulnerable to certain activities. Moods there's certain moods where you're more vulnerable. Moments there's certain moments where you might do the wrong thing. And then this one we all know this one People. There's certain people that make us want to do something and there's certain people when we hang out with them, we do things that we don't want to do. So let's talk about these things one by one real fast. Let's start with the first one, with places. There are certain places that would trigger you to do the wrong thing. For example, I was talking to someone recently in our church who quit smoking over 20 years. You know, quit smoking and there are certain places that man, if he's in this environment, it makes him want to smoke again, even though he's been free for over 20 plus years of it, because the places it triggers. There's a trigger there, even if you don't want to do it. Think about Samson. Samson didn't sleep with a prostitute in his hometown. He took 56,000 steps to do it, To go to a certain place that he didn't want to go and it's not worth it. You got to stay away from those places. Second thing is times of the day. You'll notice generally you do wrong things at a certain time of day. For example, you're probably not looking at pornography on your phone at 1030 on a Sunday when you're sitting in this building, but maybe at night you are when the end of the day comes and you're tired and you're mad and you're worn out and you need something to distract you. So it's the times there's also certain moments that you're more vulnerable.

Speaker 1: 24:39

I shared this story a few weeks ago. I was at Busch Gardens years ago and I was on the ride getting in line for the ride for Bolton. If you've never been on it, it's super fun. For the ride for Bolton, if you've never been on it, it's super fun. And so we're in line. And there was this young adult woman who was in the cart but they couldn't get the harness over her because she was overweight. And there's hundreds of people in these lines and everyone's all eyes on her. Everyone's watching her, just delaying the thing.

Speaker 1: 25:10

Eventually she gets up and you could tell she's so embarrassed and so ashamed and her family was with her and they were so kind. They were like, oh no, we'll all get off the ride. And she was like no, no, no, sit on it. And me, just a pastor's heart, my heart just like broke for her, you know, because I just know the embarrassment that she's probably feeling and things like that. And so, anyways, they go on. We go on the ride.

Speaker 1: 25:28

Sometime later in the day we're walking around the park and I see the same girl eating one of those giant ice cream funnel cakes right. And then for me the other people may have been judging her, but for me in my heart I was like dang, she's trapped in a cycle. She's trapped in a cycle. She felt shame and this is how she dealt with the shame. And then the way she dealt with the shame just reconfirmed what she already thought about herself that she's this and it's a cycle. And here you go.

Speaker 1: 25:58

It's easy to point at a situation like that because it's like, oh, it's food and overweight. But all of us in our lives, when things happen to us, when our spouse says something to us, when things going on, we can get in a cycle and we do things to try to make us feel better about it. We got to be cautious of what those things are. Okay, there's certain moments where we tend to do the same thing over again. And finally, one of the strongest factors is the people that we're around, and studies are fascinating on this. Studies are conclusive that the closer you are to someone, the more likely you have the same habits as that person you've been around. The closer you are to someone, the more likely you behave in similar ways. It's like my parents. My parents have been married for over 50 years and sometimes they act like the same people. I say why do you guys talk the same way like that? It's because they've been around each other for 50 plus years. You know that's what happens when you do that.

Speaker 1: 26:50

So the Bible and here you go. Here's the cool thing about the Bible. The Bible was spitting wisdom before you know about things like this, before psychology and whatever told us about this. The Bible says this walk with the wise, and what Become wise For a companion of fools? What Suffers harm? Basically, walk with good people. You're going to do good things. Walk with bad people. Don't be surprised when you do bad things. That's what it's saying. If you want to find yourself often doing the wrong thing. If you find yourself often doing the wrong thing around a certain group of people, my encouragement to you today would be find a new group of people. Find a new group of people. So we're going to watch for the cue, and whatever triggers us, we're going to remove the cue. The second thing is this Second thing we're going to do is we're going to interrupt the action. We're going to interrupt the action, okay, and I hope I'm being practical for you guys today. Okay, we're going to interrupt the action. Now.

Speaker 1: 27:40

I've been talking about alarm clocks since the beginning of this series. That's because Aaron and I are the two different people when it comes to alarm clocks. I am the person that typically wakes up before my alarm clock, and Erin, well, she's not. She's a snoozer, she's a snoozer. However, though, my wife is a very courageous person, and so she wanted to interrupt the action because she wanted to get up at a certain time. She wanted to do it, so the way she interrupted the action was she had her alarm. She had one of those hatch alarms, and she has the hatch alarm and she sets it all the way on the dresser to go off, so she has to get out of bed to turn it off. Recently she did find out that she can just turn it off through her phone, but she's still working on it. You can pray for her, but here you go. So here you go For me, though I didn't know the extent of what Aaron was trying to do with this alarm.

Speaker 1: 28:37

So there's this one night that I said man, I'm not feeling good, I'm going to sleep in. Man, I'm going to sleep in. I turned off my alarm and I said I'm going to sleep in, wake up to my natural body clock okay, natural body clock okay. And so I'm sleeping. My kids didn't wake up in the middle of the night. This particular night. That's a miracle.

Speaker 1: 28:54

Every time that happens. And I'm just sleeping, enjoying my best sleep, just sleeping good, deep sleep, and then suddenly, out of nowhere, the sounds of a jungle starts playing and the sounds of a lion ripping the flesh off. Another lion comes up, and then a bright light all of a sudden comes in the room and a vibration that's shaking the whole dresser happens and I wake up. I'm like, elizabeth, it's time, it's the big one, you know, I'm having a heart attack when I wake up and I'm like, oh my gosh, what is happening. And it's Aaron's alarm. It's an alarm all the way across the room.

Speaker 1: 29:34

When I wake up and I'm like, oh my gosh, what is happening? And it's Erin's alarm. It's an alarm all the way across the room. So I hurry up and hop off the bed, I turn it off and I'm like breathing hard.

Speaker 1: 29:42

I look over at Erin and she says, hmm, I'm like, how do you sleep through that? That's a true story, man. She can slump through it, but you gotta interrupt the action though. You gotta interrupt it. Here you go for some of us I know that's kind of funny, but for some of us you need to interrupt the action. You're doing some things that you know you don't want to do and you know there's a solution and it's time to be audacious. It's time to interrupt the solution, interrupt the action for you. Maybe you overspent on Amazon Buy click now.

Speaker 1: 30:14

Share your password with someone else. Aaron and I, we have a rule in our family that we never buy something $50 or more without talking to each other about it. You know you got to do it. You got to do it. You know, maybe I hit on pornography a few times in this message already. Maybe, for you, you get on your phone a content blocker.

Speaker 1: 30:33

When I was first breaking the habit, back when I was in my early 20s, late teens, I gave my brother the password. I said, hey, set this up so you know. So this will keep me accountable. The problem was, when you know, when I was pouring free and all that stuff and I needed to trade in my phone. I said, hey, isaiah, I need you to take this thing off my phone so I can trade it in. He forgot the password so I wasn't able to trade in my phone. Yeah so, but no, but for real, do something, do something. Here you go.

Speaker 1: 31:01

I'd rather do something crazy like that and find freedom in my life. That may feel a little embarrassing at first, may feel a little like, oh man, I'd rather do something like that than make a decision later on in my life that takes me away from the calling that God has on my life and the calling that God has for my family. Can I be honest again with us today? There's some things that there's. There's the devil speaks shame to us and said oh, you can't tell someone that. You can't let someone know that They'll judge you, they'll think about you. If they do, that's on them. But for you, freedom comes in that way. I need help. I need help For some of us.

Speaker 1: 31:42

Maybe you're struggling with something more than just you know over buying things on Amazon or just putting up a content blocker. Maybe for you you're struggling with a gambling addiction, a sexual addiction, a drug, a substance abuse addiction, and there's things going on and your next step isn't just getting some content remover but saying, hey, I need to go to rehab, I need to go to counseling, and the enemy I want to speak right now against the lie of the enemy and the enemy has said want to speak right now against the lie of the enemy. And the enemy has said shame, shame, that's going to be. Shame on you. No, no, no, no, no, no. It is always the right thing to do to ask for help. Wisdom asks for help. Shame hides. Ask for help. Get out there, get an accountability partner. Here you go.

Speaker 1: 32:35

What we're going to do is we're going to put what tempts us as far away from us as humanly possible, because why would you resist a temptation in the future if you have the power to eliminate it today? I can get rid of it today. I don't need to resist it because I'm going to eliminate it. If I can get rid of it today, I don't need to resist it because I'm going to eliminate it. I'm going to get it out right now. Why would you fight for something later on if you had the power to get it out of your life today? And I want to share one thing real fast, and then I'm going to close.

Speaker 1: 33:08

I'm getting off script a little bit. Sometimes it's good to get off script. It's good to get off script and to say come, holy Spirit, because yesterday I shared this with our huddle and I promise I won't get as charged up as I did in my huddle today, our team huddle but yesterday I had the opportunity honestly it was the opportunity I had to go to help at a funeral that was actually hosted right here in the school and the school needed help to run the tech stuff because our church sets all that up. So I came out and helped and, kind of the long story short of it, the gentleman who passed away was only in his early 40s and he had a thriving little league sports maybe some of you maybe even know it or whatever he had. So there's like hundreds of youth in here and that was their coach who passed away. And what the wife boldly and bravely shared at the end of her time speaking was that he had a substance issue. He had a drinking issue which was kind of a secret. It was kind of like their little family secret. And she even said on the stage I wish kind of a secret, it was kind of like their little family secret. And she even said on the stage I wish I told more people, I wish we got help. Because what ended up happening was he ended up getting liver disease and in a matter of weeks passed away.

Speaker 1: 34:22

And for me, as a pastor again, a pastor's heart I was coming here just to kind of help. They weren't Christians that I know of, you know whatever, but as a pastor's heart, I'm standing back in our sound booth listening and seeing everything that's happening and what I just felt, guys, in my heart, even right now, I actually felt like we've been hitting almost a hundred people every single week this year and this is probably I'm counting the number right now this is probably our lowest attendance we've had all year. But hey, I'm glad you're here first of all. But no shame, nothing like that. But we've been like our numbers. God has been blessing our attendance all year and but it was interesting for me, just prophetically speaking if I can, if I can share prophetically just seeing some of the empty spaces in here and seeing some of the people who are in the spaces, kind of seeing some of the people who are in the spaces, kind of seeing some of the empty spaces.

Speaker 1: 35:17

What happened when I was at that funeral yesterday? It reminded me of how important this gospel message is, because this guy did incredible things, I'm sure, but the thing that he needed was Jesus. It was Jesus, it was hope, it was freedom. And so guys, even right now, kind of looking around at this auditorium, this auditorium fills 515 people. That's a lot of people. And yesterday I had an image when I was standing at our soundboard, seeing this place packed out for this awesome man who they were celebrating his life. I saw this place packed out with people who were in grief and the Holy Spirit showed me very much that he wants to pack this place out with people who can find freedom for their lives.

Speaker 1: 36:00

I get goosebumps just saying it. There's people you know, your neighbors, friends, man, they're struggling. When I talk about one bad habit, you know other people. They got about four or five, 10 bad habits and you know you got some too. And I believe with everything inside of me that God has called this church and you are a part of this church to help reach everyday people so they can learn how to become Jesus followers, not just a part of a church, not just a part of like a cool little church club and then, once church stops, they don't go to church, but no, that they can have an authentic relationship with Jesus. That everyday people can learn how to spend daily time with God and find who they truly are in God, to have encounters with the Holy Spirit that leads them to a life everlasting and friends.

Speaker 1: 36:58

May it be said at a local vineyard church that we fill out this place not with just butts and seats but with life-changing experiences. That people will experience Jesus and future generations will be changed, because you want to know what's at stake. You want to know what's at stake. If we don't do this, if we don't help everyday people learn how to become Jesus followers, you know what we lose. We lose future generations. Future generations. They're walking away faster than ever before from the church.

Speaker 1: 37:25

But if we can help everyday people not just fall in love with the church, but fall in love with Jesus. Come on, man. Fall in love with Jesus and you want to know who Jesus is. Jesus lived the life we couldn't. He died a death we deserved, and because he loved us so much, he rose again and welcomes us into His arms.

Speaker 1: 37:48

Who is Jesus to us? Jesus is the one who can help us break our addictions. Who's Jesus to me? He's the one that took a poor young kid like me and gave me hope and freedom. Who's Jesus to you? He's your Savior, he's your Redeemer, he's your Helper, he's your hope in time of need. And who is Jesus to Melothian? He's their Savior, he's their helper, he's their freedom from bondage, he's their help in time of need. And so, friends, we don't break our habits just because we want to get better. That's a good bonus. We're breaking our bad habits so that we can position ourselves to be used by God in ways that we couldn't when we were held captive by the things that held us back.

Speaker 1: 38:42

It's not. I ain't giving you no self-help tips around here. Go to Barnes and Noble and the whole bookshelf of it. I want to become better, god. Go to Barnes, noble there's a whole bookshelf of it. I want to become better, god, not just for my sake, but for my kids, for the generation, for the people. And so, god, I'm going to remove the cues, I'm going to interrupt the actions and I'm going to remove the cues. I'm going to interrupt the actions and I'm going to define just one bad habit and start small. Maybe for you you're like yeah, jake, I got some bad, really bad habits, but maybe you just need to floss your teeth every day. I'm serious and you can have it of doing one thing that you don't want to do. That's good for you. Then it can actually lead to man. I'm going to say one nice thing about my wife every day, I'm going to pray for my kids at night.

Speaker 1: 39:44

Every day, come on, come on, you hearing what I'm saying today, friends, because Jesus says this to us All who are weary and all who are burdened, all who have habits that aren't the best. What does our Savior say? Come to me, come to me and I will judge you. No, I'll point it out to you. No, come to me and I will give you rest, and not just a good nap kind of rest, I mean rest for that anxious thought that keeps you up all night, rest. That makes sense of the mess that we live in.

Speaker 1: 40:44

So, god, jesus, holy Spirit, thank you, thank you for you, thank you for your love, thank you for your goodness. And God, right now, I pray first for every empty seat in this auditorium, because every empty seat represents one person that is your child, one person searching for freedom, searching for community, searching for hope. And Lord, we say here we are, use us, use us, lord. Now, god, pray for every person sitting in the chair. Now they're defined that one thing. And then, holy Spirit, you give them supernatural strength to do it, give them supernatural strength to break that habit, give them supernatural strength to ask for hope.

Speaker 1: 41:54

And we rebuke the lies of the enemy. We rebuke what the enemy says you can't and you won't and you never and you will always be this. We rebuke that in Jesus' name and we say what King David says create in me a pure heart, oh God. Renew in me a steadfast spirit, as Eugene Peterson said it, god, create in me a Genesis week. I mean to do something in my life. It's a new creation. The old is gone, the new is here. Search me and know me, o Lord, and lead me to this path Lead me in the steps of the everlasting. So, god, I thank you for your love, I thank you for your goodness and I thank you for your favor In Jesus' name, amen, amen. Let's give God some praise in here today.